Potty training

It occurred to me the other day that there are two very important things my son does, that are not only crucial to being a functional and independent human, but that as a parent I can take very little credit for: #1. Going to the bathroom (in a bathroom)#2. Reading. Let’s start with #1. Sure… Right before Jonah turned 2, in hopes that he would just be naturally drawn to potty training, I bought a little potty that lit up and sang if “the goods” hit the bowl. In truth… Other than becoming a receptacle for Curious George stickers and thick strands of black hair during my (weekly) blowout session (it’s the best I can do, people), ...Read More
“Mommy, we are out of toilet paper,” my 4 year old son says as he opens the cabinet to get another roll. “Time for me to fix it,” he says as he takes the old cardboard out. (This is probably his second most favorite thing in the world to do other than opening hotel rooms with “magic cards.”) “Before you put a new roll in, would you please pull up your pants, and close the toilet lid?” “But–“ “Please.” “Ok, fine.” “Thank you,” I say finishing my makeup. As I watch him carefully insert the new roll of toilet paper, I silently congratulate myself for having (raising) a son who is happy to help with ...Read More
This is the reading material my 3.5-year old would like to keep on top of the facilities…. It’s official. I live with a boy.
As best as I can, I will try to not make this another blog post about poop. I will say, however, I’m starting to think that Jonah’s constant potty talk isn’t just impart to his age. But rather, much like Degas’ fascination with ballet dancers, there is an underlying theme to my young artist’s budding imagination and visions. Perhaps his bowel movements, or lack thereof, are on his mind, as much as they’re on mine…. Take these series of drawings if you will…. When asked what he was drawing, he said matter of factly, “They are squiggly circles.” And then I saw this picture, drawn at school and dictated to one of the ...Read More
This past weekend, we took a little trip with a bunch of friends also with kiddies to Underwood Family Farms. In Los Angeles, “pumpkin patches” are usually hosted out of a parking lot behind a supermarket, with paparazzi lurking for “Stars, they’re just like us” moments. (God forbid the world shouldn’t know that Marcia Cross also “picks. out. a. pumpkin.”) So when we finally got to Underwood, approx. 50 miles out of town, I have to say I was beyond delighted that this was a far cry from your itty bitty overpriced city pumpkin patch. Nope, this was a full fledged overpriced country farm– replete with real tractors (oh ...Read More
Since the inception of this blog, I have affectionately referred to my son as “Baby-Ko.” But alas, the time has come to not only acknowledge the fact that though he is forever my baby, he is in no way a baby. He is a little boy…. A little boy with an infectious smile, incurable curiosity, and an ability to produce bowel moments on a moments notice. Yup. I simply told him that I had a Buzz Lightyear motorized motorcycle that would be his in exchange of 3 poops on the potty, and I saw in his eyes a “Noooow we’re talking, lady,” smirk that he never gave with my lousy ...Read More
There are a lot of transitions happening in the world of J-Ko right now… Transitions can be hard. I’m learning to gather strength and encouragement from within and it ain’t easy…. Learning to be your own cheerleader is definitely empowering. And at some point, I do plan on talking about these transitions. But for now, I would like to focus on one major transition… okay, well, two…   The first is that I’m sending Baby-Ko back to day care full time. It’s a no-brainer, actually…. choosing day care over a full time nanny. First of all, a full time nanny in LA costs a friggin fortune and second, Baby-Ko is 21 ...Read More
Disclaimer:  This is my blog and I’ll talk poop if I want to. POOP SHAME: THE FINAL CHAPTER As I’ve mentioned over the past couple of weeks or so, Baby-Ko’s vocabulary is really taking off. He’s repeating nearly everything, including the words that he shouldn’t (I dropped a carton of milk and cursed, to which he followed promptly with “Oh, Tuck!) I know that an 18 month old with a truck driver mouth isn’t something to brag about, but I must say, hearing him string two words together, (even an “oh”), was awesome. And of course, given the fact that Bee-Bee’s made it known that poo-poo is Oof, it should come as no ...Read More
Last week, I got a Baby Center email update telling me that my “baby” may be ready to start potty training.  DELETE.  OOPS.  See, according to the pediatrician (who I pretty much forced in to telling me that Baby-Ko’s language skills were advanced for his age, to which I literally did a high school/napoleon dynamite “yeeessss!”), Baby-Ko is in fact ready to start “potty training.” He would like to see him fully trained, or at least interested and “engaged” in the toilet and all that it entails by the age of 2… which is in 6 months…. EEK.  That’s a lot of stinkin’ pressure… literally. Twenty minutes ago, I just heard Bee-Bee and ...Read More
The other day, our nanny (“Bee-Bee”), proudly exclaimed that Baby-Ko has been mimicking her. She told me that when she went to change his diaper, it was stinky and she said “Ooof,” and he copied her and said “oof!” She thought it was hilarious and I guess created a little game and while making a “pee-eww!” face says, “Baby-Ko, do you have poo-poo?” He then says, “Nooo. Ooof!” She  proudly showed me their little poo-poo shtick game and I laughed.  Funny (smart) kid, I thought.  Poo-poo is “ooof.” But the next day, when I saw he was sort of struggling while making poops, I said, “Baby-Ko are you making-” and he, ...Read More