October, 2009

Last night I slept on the floor. Yes. The floor. Next to Baby-Ko’s crib. In a fetal position. Using his changing pad as pillow, and my robe as a blanket, I managed to squeeze my arm through a slat so that my son, my very (possibly terrible) two year old son, could hold my hand, and eventually (pray god) fall the eff asleep. Two hours and one majorly numb hip later, I gently removed my hand from his grip, and literally crept out of the room cursing every creak my exhausted knees caused as I crawled down the hallway. For about a week now, I have broken every rule in THE sleep ...Read More
If you are here and reading this, good. If you are here and reading this, after trying to figure out how come it took you so long to figure out how to be here and reading this, sorry. And thank you. Without getting in to it, let’s just say my shit was hijacked– my domain name basically expired or lapsed (without me knowing) and somebody swooped in and seized it. Apparently this is done all the time… an opportunity for someone to make some money I assume, as I will have to now get in a bidding war with a complete stranger over what is essentially MY identity — I mean, ...Read More
10.13.09
2
About 15 years ago, as I laid in bed practically hallucinating from a horrible flu/fever watching what seemed like the most magical infomercial ever, I decided I needed the Mob Hits CD Volume 1…. And 2. I think I had just written a paper on “Good Fellas” and must have been in the mafia mode (or just craving pizza), and just had to have it. (Plus it was free shipping and handling, and I think they were offering a snow globe too. It was a deal. Trust). I probably listened to it once or twice and that was that… It got buried with my Edie Brickell and Toad of the ...Read More
10.09.09
2
Discipline. The D Word. Something I’ve never been very good at when it comes to myself (diet, exercise, french fries etc.)… and something I’m realizing that I’m not so great at when it comes to my son. Shortly after Baby-Ko turned 1 and started “testing,” I remembered the pride I felt when a mere look or simple redirection of attention settled his urge to do the “don’t” and I certainly didn’t need to use the evil “N” word. I had mastered parenting at an early age (both mine and his), and I thought whoever invented “time out” could just suck it. My kid’s GOOD. Really good… ...Read More
For the first time in what feels like forever, it finally feels like fall here in Sunny LA. Sure, fall in LA means 72 degrees (i.e. a cute cotton scarf over a short sleeved v-neck tee) and is considered kind of “p*ssy” compared to the big boy cities that really do experience four seasons… We may not feel the onset of football, turtlenecks, and “hot totties” (or whatever it is you East Coasters do in October), but we do feel the “boot effect” come in to play, and you know what people: In my opin, it’s better than hot apple cider and raking leaves. To me, there ...Read More