mom of boys

04.20.21
3
When I was in 4th grade, in addition to thinking that Corey Haim and I would one day meet and fall in love, I considered myself to have a very keen sense of style (as exhibited by that darling get up on your left here). I just knew what was in and I knew what I liked. Luckily for me, the stir-up leggings, pushy socks, and over-sized sweatshirts splattered with neon paint look suited my twice baked potato like figure. Oh, if only the Gen Z fashion dictators of today’s world had any respect for thin-legged-bloated-tummy girls like me… But in 1985, I had the potential to be totally rad. ...Read More
Global Warming is My Fault I used to think that the worst thing I could do for my kids was let them have too much screen time. But the other day, when Oliver let 5 helium balloons “fly to the moon” without any concern, I realized my Fort Nite, Ryan’s Toys, YouTube addicted little monkeys were the least of my worries: I am raising global warming terrorists and they give zero f**s about their carbon footprints (I’m saying those words as if I even know what that means). This past week, I was convinced that a NBC Local news van was going to show up at my house to run a breaking ...Read More
The day we got Apple… Dear Dog People of America, I am writing to you today in an effort to merge our two worlds: the world of people that cry during animal rescue commercials, and the world of people that do not cry during animal rescue commercials. I fall in to the please keep reading so you don’t hate me category… You see much like Elsa, I’ve spent most of my life in the icy world of Arendelle where it is eternal winter and dogs are not allowed… In my heart. Well, I mean, they’re allowed, but because it’s so cold, they’re just not welcome. The only pet I ever had was a black cat ...Read More
For the Win Maybe it’s his age, (I hope it’s his age), but according to Jonah, everything we do is soooo boring and not cool. He “barely gets to (insert ANYTHING a 10-year old would like to do),” and he never, I repeat NEVER gets to stay up late or have a sleepover in our bed. Also, I should mention EVERTHING I cook “is soooo gross and is always organic or made with stevia.” (Okay, I admit, that’s like half true. One point for Jonah). At seems like lately, on a daily basis, I become THAT mom: “Do you realize how lucky you are? How privileged you are?” I list all the ...Read More
04.05.17
3
21 Weeks… I think… Remember This Life is moving quickly these days. I’m more than halfway through my pregnancy, we’re in escrow on our house (and on the hunt for a new one), Oliver knows that “P” is for “poo poo!” and Jonah has questions about Brexit . I truly can’t keep up. The other day, as I watched Oliver literally throw himself on the floor because I wouldn’t hand over my phone so he could look at photos and probably surf for porn, (Kids are very advanced these days), I realized I haven’t been documenting his milestones (including the ones that make me want to throw myself on the floor too). With ...Read More