“Are you so excited to come with me?” I asked T-Ko as we got dressed.
“Oh, yeah. Thrilled,” he said dryly. “I’ve been waiting for this day my whole life.”
“You’ll be in a room full of women…”
“Who cares? Their vaginas all look like Glad bags.”
“What?! A glad bag?? Does MY vagina look like a ‘glad bag?'”
“I don’t know. I never see it.”
“Ha ha.” I quickly pull down my pants and flash T-Ko. (Mommy is sassy!)
“Nope. It’s fine,” he says.
“Phew,” I say sarcastically.

Okay. I realize that T-Ko is not the “oooh, can I come with you to Mommy & Me” kind of Daddy, BUT I was hoping for a little more enthusiasm. I mean, I have been taking Baby-Ko to Wacky’s class for 5 months now and a lot of the other daddies have attended before. Not to mention, I was dying for him to meet Wacky and become brainwashed just like me. Usually I return from class and tell him the newest advice that Wacky has given us, (like “under no circumstance, may you take the babies in a public pool”), to which T-Ko always responds “F Wacky.”

“Hmm, what can I do to embarrass you…?” T-Ko said mischievously as we pulled up to class.
“Nothing. Don’t do anything. Just sit and observe.” I said seriously. “I hope your socks don’t have holes in them.”
“What? Why??”
“Because you can’t wear shoes in the class.”
“I hate it already.”

Of course, T-Ko didn’t hate it at all. In fact, I’m pretty sure he enjoyed it. It certainly helped that Wacky was in a cheerful mood and answered all of my annoying questions without any obvious judgement. It also helped that the other mommies encouraged T-Ko to join us during “Happy Feet” (the dance we do at the end of the class with the babies).

There was no way I was going to be able to convince him to join us for lunch afterwards, but at least I got him to come to Wacky’s class and see what hype is all about. Plus, seeing T-Ko dance with Baby-Ko, was enough to keep me happy for a long time… And I’m pretty sure seeing my hoo ha, albeit briefly, and confirming that it does not in fact resemble a Glad trash bag (whatever that means), is enough to keep HIM happy for, well, at least a few days…

FILED UNDER: A Little Life

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