parenting

04.20.21
2
When I was in 4th grade, in addition to thinking that Corey Haim and I would one day meet and fall in love, I considered myself to have a very keen sense of style (as exhibited by that darling get up on your left here). I just knew what was in and I knew what I liked. Luckily for me, the stir-up leggings, pushy socks, and over-sized sweatshirts splattered with neon paint look suited my twice baked potato like figure. Oh, if only the Gen Z fashion dictators of today’s world had any respect for thin-legged-bloated-tummy girls like me… But in 1985, I had the potential to be totally rad. ...Read More
26 Hours in London “You’ll write about this. I mean, it’s a blog post: ‘Mom guilt and why it’s never ending.’” “No matter what you do…” I said. “No matter what you do,” Jenn said shaking her head while hailing a cab. We had been in London for 26 hours (well, almost 28 if you count the hour and a half it took to get through customs when we landed), when I got the call: “You need to come home.” Everett had been admitted to the hospital for a severe allergic reaction to Penicillin. At least at that point they thoughtthat’s what it was. For the sake of me being a virgo story, let me give ...Read More
Global Warming is My Fault I used to think that the worst thing I could do for my kids was let them have too much screen time. But the other day, when Oliver let 5 helium balloons “fly to the moon” without any concern, I realized my Fort Nite, Ryan’s Toys, YouTube addicted little monkeys were the least of my worries: I am raising global warming terrorists and they give zero f**s about their carbon footprints (I’m saying those words as if I even know what that means). This past week, I was convinced that a NBC Local news van was going to show up at my house to run a breaking ...Read More
You know those moments as a parent where you just give up? Where you just say, “Fine, eat the cookie,” “Okay, download another game,” “Yes, you can watch a violent, inappropriate movie/show, video?” Oh, no? You don’t know those moments? Oh, sorry. I think you’ve come to the wrong blog then. Head to my Pinterest page though where everything looks perfect my Pinterest page though where I make it look like I’m perfect…aI So… I don’t know if it’s just my 7 year old, but lately, everything ends in “Awww,” or “Not fair,” or  “Okay, fine but you have to___” (fill in the blank with something I have to do for him because somehow he’s ...Read More
Exactly two years ago this week, I came home from a 3 day trip to Haiti on a mission with Ladies’ Home Journal, Crocs Cares, and Feed the Children to deliver shoes to school children. It was the best time of my life and the worst time of my life. To travel so far and literally outside my comfort zone to a world I would have never imagined traveling to, and to be in a position to take some part (albeit, small) in helping children in need: The Best. The worst: To be so far away from home and to know that when I do get home, teaching my child what gratitude really is, in a world ...Read More
At a certain point, I thought Jonah’s love of bathroom talk (read: all things poop and fart) would sort of dwindle… With age, a bigger interest in sports, video games and Lego sets that have wiped out my savings, I just figured the potty talk would die. Oh, silly, woman. How wrong you were. Nope, poop talk is still a hit. And it’s even better when you’re 7 years-old and the other (grown) male in the house is right there with you in this topic. Many a night has a bedtime routine been derailed as a fart escapes one of them… Turning my house into a Beevis and Butthead sketch. (Butthead. Ha, if Jonah ...Read More
The other day… Just as we were about to walk out the door to school… J: Oh, Mom! Can you give me a dollar? Me: Why? J: Because… I need one. Me: Why do you need one? J: Because I promised *Leo I’d give him a dollar. Me: Um. Why did you promise Leo you’d give him a dollar? J: Because he let me cut in line. So I told him I’d give him a dollar. He puts his hand out. I stared at him blankly.  J: Mom. Hello? Can I have one? Was this conversation really happening? When did he get to be a full-fledged kid ensued in  playground bribery? Are these kind of exchanges between boys common, I wondered? When ...Read More
A couple weeks ago, Peter and I took Jonah to Disneyland for his 6th birthday. In a recent post for Babble, I shared how this trip made me realize I don’t always need to be the Fairy Godmother of Fun… *** “Mom, pleeeeeease can we play? Can we do something fun? This is so boooring. Monday is soooooo boring,” my 6-year-old whined to me as I sat at my desk. Nine times out of ten, I would have called in the circus and pulled out my “let me entertain you” hat. Instead of letting him be bored and then sitting with my own guilt about having to work, steam broccoli, fold laundry, and ...Read More
It occurred to me the other day that there are two very important things my son does, that are not only crucial to being a functional and independent human, but that as a parent I can take very little credit for: #1. Going to the bathroom (in a bathroom)#2. Reading. Let’s start with #1. Sure… Right before Jonah turned 2, in hopes that he would just be naturally drawn to potty training, I bought a little potty that lit up and sang if “the goods” hit the bowl. In truth… Other than becoming a receptacle for Curious George stickers and thick strands of black hair during my (weekly) blowout session (it’s the best I can do, people), ...Read More
As I’ve mentioned many times before, once a month I attend “mommy school” with a bunch of my friends. We head to the Westside to seek the advice and guidance of the renowned Betsy Brown Braun. Each month we focus on various issues that have arisen for our 4 year olds (everyone in the class has children within a few months apart- so we’re all on the same “fucking fours,” page, as Betsy calls it). Anyway, a month or two ago, I expressed to Betsy that I was having a tough time containing Jonah’s energy– that more often than not, he is wild. She suggested that we set ...Read More